None of your Beeswax!

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    1666 comments  ·  Grindr Feedback  ·  Flag idea as inappropriate…  ·  Admin →

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    None of your Beeswax! commented  · 

    what could be the cause of this anger, i wonder?

    An error occurred while saving the comment
    None of your Beeswax! commented  · 

    aww.. ..eventide, you're so cute.
    puffing up yer little chest on here, talking like you're the grindr uservoice forum enforcer.

    i wonder..
    ..based on what qualifications, exactly, do you presume your shitty opinions are worth more than my well-thought out statements?
    .
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    though, yeah.
    yeah, you're right, eventide.

    "we" do need a filter.
    a filter to help "us" be rid of absolute, wastes of space, wastes of breath, wastes of life trash like yourself.

    🥰

    [strike]i presume you're white, or someone non-white who fancies trying to align himself with the (problematic) Kolonizing Klan of the world, right?
    indeed.
    and here you are in 2022, arguing with a black man and a latin man about race matters.[/strike]

    and here you are in 2022: a white man arguing with a black man and a latin man about how we're supposed to handle race matters.

    classic.

    i probably shouldn't mention this here but, something else i've learned some time ago about you and your ilk, is whenever you are asked it directly, you never will openly respond with "No I am not prejudiced nor racist against anyone" or "Yes I am racist and prejudiced and proud of it — and these are the fuckers who I detest because of their race."

    of course, i don't expect any better from your ad hominem-ing ass eventide.

    but, ya know?
    go ahead.
    please do share with "us," what is it you know about the subject of prejudice, discrimination, bias, oppression, racism, etc. — which joshua and i don't?

    come.

    is this a direct question you feel up for answering directly, or are you just gonna ad-hominem yourself away from that too?

    =========

    juan?

    are you directing that critique towards steve and eventide (and ES, apparently?)..
    ..or did you direct that critique towards joshua and i?

    for the record, i'm not "forcing" the colour discriminators to find sexual attraction for anyone — i'm only "forcing" them to acknowledge the reasoning behind their prejudice and how, on the whole, discrimination solely because of someone's skin colour, nationality, or bloodline is pretty dumb and senseless

    there is no equating a MSM's espousing a categorical "no indians" or "no blacks" or "no arabs" (and so on) to a MSM's espousing a categorical "no women"

    i know for a fact i was BORN with almost zero natural attraction to the female gender — there was no one in my household grooming me to not desire women, NOR was anyone in my household grooming me to want a hard dick in my mouth

    me lusting for men and not lusting for women is what you very much-can consider a "biological imperative" over which i had no control; NOR had i had this disposition taught me by anyone.

    =========

    what *is* so "different" about me, i wonder?
    why don't i go around saying "no whites" or "no asians" or "no blacks" or "no latinos" (etc.)?

    how is it possible, i find all nationalities / bloodlines equally appealing?

    .....

    on second thought.
    nah.

    never mind all that.
    i know i'm only preaching to the choir, posing that kinda rhetorical.

    eventide / steve, and whoever else: i know you're just gonna come back with further garbage.
    further garbage, that will not address why you NEED to filter out by race.

    so please don't bother.

    be happy you and i both agree you discriminators SHOULD have your race filter restored.

    oh.
    by the way.
    do you have a problem with me calling you "discriminators"?
    but, is that not what you are?
    i can readily tell you i sexually-exclude 99.01 - 99.98% of all transsexual / transgender women — MtFs.
    almost all MtFs, i never shall willingly go to bed with.

    but, you observe how easy that was for me?
    i owned up to an entire group i sexually preclude. (i can even explain for you why i preclude MtFs, if you're curious.).
    there are other attributes people might have —some attributes of which, they have no immediate control over— which would cause me to "automatically" preclude them from my attraction pool; though for the sake of "staying on topic" eventide i won't mention them here.

    😂

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    None of your Beeswax! commented  · 

    @Anonymous ( April 28, 2022 14:48 )

    I appreciate your response, in which you were being reasonable and respectful with me.

    Regarding the policing of preferences (a word which, in this context, I'd almost always place within quotation marks) — in spite of my strong words thus far, I'll reäffirm that I am *quite* 'in favour' of an in-app ethnicity filter, for the racists / prejudiced fellows to employ.

    Let it be known: I *had* been (and am presently) working on another response for the 2 - 3 individuals who, thus far, have seen fit to ad hominem / logical-fallacy me here — in this response, I happen to detail, further, how I believe the restored race filter should work.
    No need to worry.. ..My proposed caveats, at their worst, affect neither the discriminator / discriminatee. If anything, the discriminators should be tickled pink.

    =========

    Addressing this to the general forum / my current set of detractors:

    Years ago, I'd arrived to the conclusion, I live in a world with many humans who just can't be reasoned with. Humans who, functionally, are "lost causes," who are better off disposed of than to be allowed to continue on, wreaking havoc and causing other innocent humans undue misery.

    • If you are a *rump supporter / sympathizer
    • If you believe racism / oppression is not an issue
    • If you're a "pick yourself up by the bootstrap" espouser
    • If you believe in "rules for thee, but not for me,"

    technically, I've already written you off.
    I know I won't be changing your mind, much in the same way you may be assured you will never change my mind.

    And supposing you did, somehow, manage that, I'd be a fool to believe you'd embrace me unconditionally: because, long before I came out swinging on this forum, you already decided you didn't "like my kind." Because of my skin.

    I'm still amazed you don't come out and say "I don't like the black race." Fucked up as that is, I wouldn't advocate for your being banned / banished off here for making that kind of declaration, of itself.
    It's when you start bringing in the extra shit that I have the problem.

    An error occurred while saving the comment
    None of your Beeswax! commented  · 

    I have a query for you guys. A simple query, really.

    I want to know: Is it your intention to put forth the claim, that 100% of all individuals who conscientiously reject other humans—rejections made, specifically because of those humans' ethnicity / skin colour, and nothing else—never do so with prejudicial / racist reasoning?

    That 100% of you who colour-exclude, exclude simply because "it's your preference," and not because you hold specific unfavourable biases against the targeted?

    That a white, or asian, latin person who states "White or Latin only" / "No blacks (or Arabs)" only has the purest of intentions?

    100%?
    .
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    On another note, I am less troubled by people who say "I only want to deal with my race," because at least those folks exclude *everyone else* equally. And their motives for their "prejudice" are pretty obvious.
    .
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    .
    Thirdly, right now we blacks are the ones who are getting shat on, purposefully, the most in this world (with the American Indigenous / Latino, Indians, and Middle Easterners following quite closely).

    =========

    That is why I'm really not interested, at all, in any "but what-aboutisms?" towards those black people who do stipulate "No whites" — functionally, most white people could care less, and don't view this as a "loss" for them, anyway;
    .
    .
    I find it more substantially-more problematic, rather, when a fellow black person goes and proudly says "I'm into Whites" / "I'm into Whites / [Light-Skinned\White-presenting] Latinos" only — but perhaps even worse than them, are the Latin / White (and Arabs + Asians, as appropriate) people who suddenly can't find it within them to spare any words of reproach toward this obvious self-loathing black person.
    .
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    But, at the end of the day, here's what I'm really getting at—

    —It is true that you, as a man who seeks relations with others of the male gender ("MSM" for short), are not obligated to be attracted to every man.
    I wouldn't expect you to, seeing as I am not.

    But at least have the balls to admit it when your reasoning for exclusion is based on prejudice and/or racism.
    .
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    (p.s. — Only whites can be racist. Whenever a BIPOC discriminates, it falls under the classification of prejudice.
    If you wish to argue against me on this matter, then you're someone who "should be given no part in our society any longer," for real.)

    An error occurred while saving the comment
    None of your Beeswax! commented  · 

    @ ES
    I refuse to believe "every single black person" (in your area) seek only trans. I feel like there probably were black men who've previously expressed interest in you but you turned them down for not being your type (which is fine, that's your right to not be attracted to everyone).
    I might've been more likely to had lent credence to your lament if you had stated instead "every single black man WHO IS MY TYPE seem to only want chicks with dicks."

    Never-the-less...
    ...I agree with you, 100%, GrindR should (if for no one else) be allowing unlimited members the capability to filter by ethnicity and by gender expression.

    If I were paying GrindR for "premium" service, I know I would want to option to unclog my grid of those individuals whom I never will be attracted to—I am turned on by male / masculine features, which can include the transmen who completely commit to being men—and from those who never will be attracted to me, as I am not a girly boy.

    The self-loathing, scared boys who are too afraid to face off with *real* men.

    The unfortunate guys who probably could have benefitted from some real, serious counseling / intervention — I know *some* people were born in the wrong bodies.. ..But *this* many males with "gender dysphoria"? (Pretty troubling, indeed..)
    Moreover, I can just look at their pictures and tell they're dealing with mental health issues, even serious mental dysfunction. These dudes made their little "switch," emulating what they think it means to be a woman, and they're still not happy. (If anything, their problems are now multiplied.)

    On the other hand.. ..Nothing about GrindR strikes me as being worth $40 a month. Basic functionalities which Scruff has, GrindR wants to charge us for.

    At any rate, I hope you are not under the impression every black man is "like that."
    We are not.

    @ Cody Padgett
    It is true you didn't come right *out* with saying 'The "N" Word' (the "N" word with the hard "-er"), but you might as well have.
    Because, with all those words in your comment down there, and you chose to only abbreviate "people" — in reference to us black people.

    Yep.

    You conscientiously-chose to reduce us to just "ppl" because, in your eyes, we're not even worthy of the consideration of the full word "people."

    "Ethnicity" and "Majority" and "Actually" require more effort to spell out than "people," so I don't want to hear any bullshit from you about "I was just saving time" or "I didn't mean it that way."

    You managed to cram in so many micro-aggressions against African-Americans, within the span of those fifteen words... ...You should just come out and say you don't like black PEOPLE.

    First of all, I am a black man, and I am in support of restoring the ethnicity filter.
    (So on that basis alone, automatically, your assertion of "It's only the black ppl" is factually inaccurate.)

    I am a black man, and I don't arbitrarily restrict my attraction to ANYONE based solely on their skin colour or perceived ethnicity — so I have no need (nor desire) for that sort of "filter" myself.

    I am a black man, and I want the ethnicity filter restored.. ..Though, on the condition, all those individuals who find my black skin problematic / repulsive, reciprocally-are filtered out of MY grid, so I don't have to see THEM.
    i don't have a need to see prejudiced, racist bigots — and good riddance.

    second of all, it's not the ethnicity filter "black ppl" have the beef with — our beef is with the racist, bigoted prejudiced assholes who see no problems with their behaviour.

    i'd love to know what you think about the indian, latin, thai, white, philipino, cantonese, arab men who willing buried their faces in my crotch — who all made it exceedingly clear, to me, they wanted to be bred with my black seed.
    black seed, explicitly, from MY black dick.

    you reckon something is wrong with them, because of this desire? are you thinking, "how can they want to lay with a lowly n--ger like that? don't they have any higher standards for themselves?!"?

    you can't conceive such a desire is possible?

    you can't conceive it possible, people being attracted to others 'in spite of,' 'because of,' OR 'regardless of' colour?

    None of your Beeswax! supported this idea  · 
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    None of your Beeswax! commented  · 

    yeah, honestly?

    removing the ethnicity filter was nothing but an empty, performative platitude grindr enacted to quiet down some squeaky wheels

    nothing meaningful was accomplished by doing this

    i also would not be shocked if grindr didn't view this "politically correct" move as nothing but an opportunity for a potential money grab, one that makes it more annoying for folks to find what they want (or exclude what they believe they don't want)

    we all know the racists, the close-minded, and the bigots are going to stay racist, bigoted, close-minded, and/or prejudiced — nothing has changed just because their ability to directly sort according to their biases, however short-sighted, has been taken away by the platform they happen to be on

    i'm of the opinion: good riddance

    i don't want colour-excluding assholes clogging up *my* grid — irregarding whatever reason the asshole excludes by colour

    so, grindr?
    bring it back
    go ahead and bring that ethnicity filter back

    find yourself another battle to fight
    fight *this* battle in another way
    unless, of course, you actually don't care about the marginalized/ostracized — only the dollars that you would lose if that function of your app is restored (for free)...
    ...which, from what i've observed, actually is a "modus operandi" that is well within 'brand' for your company

    P.S. — i'm a black man who does NOT engage in making categorical ethnicity-based exclusions
    i'm also a black man who recognizes EVERYONE can be a remarkably-foul piece of shit, irrespective the colouring of their skin

    that said, i will leave off with these two points here:

    1.) colour exclusionists? ask yourself WHY you exclude all members of a given ethnicity

    2.) we've been fighting this war for centuries now, and might well continue fighting it for centuries more

    i do have one fun factoid/reminder: back during the time of sanctioned black enslavement, some white enslavers DID, very much, have no problems seeking us out for their sexual gratification
    they evidently weren't repulsed by the idea of becoming intimately-acquainted with our ebony black flesh, eh?

    actually, now that i think about about...
    ...this is also true of the colonizers from western europe — the "latin" ones who invaded / pillaged the indigenous of south and north america for many generations

    is it not?

    those white parasites couldn't help themselves from schtupping all those golden brown natives (natives who, originally, were-all minding their own business...not even aware of the impending White Doom) either

    those colonizers didn't turn *their* noses up at the idea of commingling with "lesser" coloured people, now did they?

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    None of your Beeswax! commented  · 

    depending on the phone (and whether its software is up to date), you already have two options—ON ANDROID—for this ameer:

    1.) open grindr
    2.) go to settings
    3.) go to Discreet App Icon
    4.) select the icon (from the 5 offered choices) of your choosing
    5.) profit

    myself, i like the "To Do" icon — it looks innocuous enough, and no one who might have access to your phone should be inclined to randomly tap on it

    (of course.. ..i would find it odd if your phone doesn't have basic security functions which can prevent a normal snooper from just getting in without a fight)

    =========

    your second option involves your directly editing the app icon / display name itself — which you do have the power to do, any time

    on my phone, my procedure for editing the grindr icon is my finding any functioning copy of the icon and then depressing it for about a second — depressing the icon makes a menu with an "edit" option pop up

    i activate "edit" and i can go from there

    also, you can always stash this icon away in a folder, if you wanna try to make it a bit harder for some random homophobic snooper to try and catch ya
    .
    .
    .
    actually ameer: since i'm here, i should also mention (in case you don't know), on android, you can also change the various sound effects of your app; and you can even disable the "in app" sounds — though, i feel i should point out, the chances of a 100% straight person knowing how grindR sounds like is pretty small

    still, you can buffer your discretion even further, with that method
    on android

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    None of your Beeswax! commented  · 

    If GrindR charged everyone a flat 25¢ - $1 a month fee for FULL app access (and no more of their shitty obtrusive ADs), I think they'd end up with more money in their pockets, in the long run, than what they'll make with this $40 a month crap they're trying to pull.

    Even I can swing 50¢ a month without batting an eye.. ..And I suspect, even more people can part with 25¢ with no especial problems.
    Conversely: as the saying goes, "if you can't part with 25¢ without it being a hardship for you, you probably should be focusing on other things than being on the apps" looking for dick, bussy, or whatever you're into.

    None of your Beeswax! supported this idea  · 
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