I, along with thousands of other gays, am a side. Unlike tops or bottoms, we don’t enjoy partaking in anal sex. Unfortunately the only options available under “position” all refer to anal sex. It’d be very helpful to include an “oral only” or “side” or anything really, so that we don’t have to explain ourselves to everyone who messages us.
Nikki Moorehead commented
This is long overdue! I'm proud to be a side and guys like us need to be able to identify and be found.
I support this. Calum McSwiggan explains the 'side' position in this video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wC-jDU1xgDs
Rodzki Almo commented
I agree to include ORAL ONLY for i am not into horse back riding nor a good samaritan either.... tops and bots knows these phrases hahaha by the way i am into sides.I adore cock putting into my mouth not inside a cave full of bats and i love my cock to be suck not fck. Haha
Paul Rosenberg commented
News flash: Anal sex is not THE definitional act for men who have sex with men. Search Wikipedia for “gay sexual activity” and you find this: “… an online survey of 18,000 MSM in Europe "showed that oral sex was most commonly practised, followed by mutual masturbation, with anal intercourse in third place." A 2011 survey by The Journal of Sexual Medicine found similar results for U.S. gay and bisexual men. Kissing a partner on the mouth (74.5%), oral sex (72.7%), and partnered masturbation (68.4%) were the three most common behaviors…”
This topic is getting so much response and overwhelming support because non-anal is MAINSTREAM sexual preference for us. Is anybody at Grindr actually using Uservoice or is this just a tool for diverting users so complaints can be ignored? This has gone long enough. DO SOMETHING.
Bachir Zazon commented
Hola quetal filez año nuevo a todos... nicisito activar la página de grinder
It's astonishing that adding an option to an existing filter gets ignored by Grindr for so long.
- There are significant number of people identifying as a "Side".
- This addition won't affect users who don't identify (or agree) with the "Side" definition.
- This addition will benefit users like myself, who don't fit into other categories and feel excluded (as if being gay is not enough exclusion in life :)
- IT TAKES ZERO ENGINEERING EFFORT.
Please Grindr, at least comment on this issue.
This should totally happen although I am a bottom I can see the frustration I whole heartedly support this
I support this!
John Liebgott commented
I support the addition of the term Side. If there are people asking for it then there must be a reason. Some people may not understand at first but they will sooner than later.
While I endorse including the category “Oral Only,” I would not understand the term “Side” to mean the same or necessarily to exclude anal sex. Maybe my understanding of homosexual vernacular is limited. “Side” strikes me as ambiguous, possibly horizontal doggy style anal sex as well as simultaneous 69 oral in bed.
King Sized commented
As times change, so can the definition of words. A tweet is not a bird chirping, and if something is "fire" it probably does not mean it's in flames.(<AAVE) Us gays have a knack for taking ownership of a word or phrase and changing it's meaning. Or maybe a "bear" is just an animal who lives in the mountains? And if these grindr guys are "thirsty" I doubt you mean they need some water. It's a simple change and I promise you there are a lot more of us out there than you think. And I want to be called a "side" not "that gay guy who doesn't do anal"
Donald Garretson commented
Side sounds more like you are the person a married man has sex with outside his marriage.
Better to have "no anal", "oral" and "masterbation" then something ridiculous like "side". Plus with only a very tiny handful of guys using it, it is not really worth adding.
Sam Tanng commented
Can we add the sexual preference option, "Side"? As opposed to top, bottom, oral, versatile, etc? A side is someone who doesn't top or bottom, but likes everything else. There are many men out there who identify as sides, and it would be great to add this on as an additional screener. Thank you!
Curli Fri commented
Having the option to identify as side would not only save time for both ppl who like anal and ppl who don’t to find each other and have less explaining to do, but it would help educate the community on what a side is without sides having to constantly educate every individual who messages that might not even stay in their lives.
As a side myself I can old add that it is not fair on the tops and bottoms who are left guessing.
Paul Rosenberg commented
Hear hear! C’mon, Grindr! You can do this. It takes NOTHING away from the guys who want to F and it opens up a world of options for so many MSM who don’t. It also opens up and broadens an important conversation among men who have sex with men about what constitutes great sex, and it encourages openness about our desires. You know, many of the men who currently list as top or bottom are only doing so because they don’t even know that there’s a valid alternative to buttsex. Please take action to improve your platform by welcoming the hoards of hоrny guys who break the mold.
I've commented on this before, and I continually get updates--and almost EVERYONE supports a third option to the standard top/bottom. Yet as "MAX" has just pointed out, six months later and no change--when it would be SO simple for a programmer to change this.
I'm a bottom, but it makes so much sense to offer this third option. How about it guys? ("guys' meaning the powers that be at Grinder)
Super simple change to make, and yet six months later still nothing...
Yoi Raab commented
Side doesn’t just mean oral only guys. Sheeesh.