I try to see the best in people. I am young and naive: it's basically in my nature. So when I think about Grindr, I assume that the guy who made it just wanted to create a way for gay men to easily interact and hang out and meet. I assume he didn't completely intend for it to be the meat market that it is today. Even if he did, I don't judge him for it; *** and **** aren't bad things to pursue.
But there's one thing about Grindr that really bothers me. It should bother the Grindr team as well because this one thing makes Grindr the literal manifestation of everything that is wrong with the LGBT community. It makes it a place where a huge majority of the community is made to feel ugly, unwanted, undesirable, lonely, and at times, not even human.
I speak of the whole NR=NI (no reply=no interest) concept. You see it on profiles of guys who think they're a gift from the Gods, a literal Adonis on Earth. They think that they are SO MUCH BETTER than the rest of us, when in fact, they just put a lot of effort into how they look.
There are many reasons why people may not respond to messages. Maybe they're inundated with messages to the point that they can only bother to respond to the ones they want to bone. It could be racism, ageism, looks based, lack of a picture...all these reasons are fine. Yes, you have the right to sleep/talk/date who YOU want, whether this preference is made on a less-than-decent reason.
Being a brown, non-Western, skinny guy, I've been rejected for many, many reasons. It's not the rejection that bothers me; it's the lack of a response. It makes you feel like a pile of ****. Living in a country where homophobia is rampant, and laws are against us, I don't need that from the LGBT elite as well. If you don't like me, tell me that to my face, instead of ignoring me like I'm an inanimate object.
Grindr should implement a way that you can automatically reject people, and this sends an automated message to them. Perhaps it could be like a swiping UX like in Tinder or a thumbs down or something. Maybe deleting an unopened message could prompt the message. Just make it so that people like me don't get **** from the one place where we thought we would be embraced. In my country, we don't have gay bars or parties. Only a few cities hold pride parades. For most of us, Grindr is the "gay" life. It's more than a dating app; it's a place where we can be ourselves. And to come online and face this kind of demeaning, condescending treatment is worse than any homophobia I've faced. Straight people don't do this to each other. ****, most educated, open-minded straight people But a few physically endowed men in the gay community feel entitled to do this. Grindr has the social responsibility to make sure all its users feel at ease, and emotionally protected. Because we have a lot of other people willing to ruin our lives without us doing it ourselves.
Athul
I try to see the best in people. I am young and naive: it's basically in my nature. So when I think about Grindr, I assume that the guy who made it just wanted to create a way for gay men to easily interact and hang out and meet. I assume he didn't completely intend for it to be the meat market that it is today. Even if he did, I don't judge him for it; *** and **** aren't bad things to pursue.
But there's one thing about Grindr that really bothers me. It should bother the Grindr team as well because this one thing makes Grindr the literal manifestation of everything that is wrong with the LGBT community. It makes it a place where a huge majority of the community is made to feel ugly, unwanted, undesirable, lonely, and at times, not even human.
I speak of the whole NR=NI (no reply=no interest) concept. You see it on profiles of guys who think they're a gift from the Gods, a literal Adonis on Earth. They think that they are SO MUCH BETTER than the rest of us, when in fact, they just put a lot of effort into how they look.
There are many reasons why people may not respond to messages. Maybe they're inundated with messages to the point that they can only bother to respond to the ones they want to bone. It could be racism, ageism, looks based, lack of a picture...all these reasons are fine. Yes, you have the right to sleep/talk/date who YOU want, whether this preference is made on a less-than-decent reason.
Being a brown, non-Western, skinny guy, I've been rejected for many, many reasons. It's not the rejection that bothers me; it's the lack of a response. It makes you feel like a pile of ****. Living in a country where homophobia is rampant, and laws are against us, I don't need that from the LGBT elite as well. If you don't like me, tell me that to my face, instead of ignoring me like I'm an inanimate object.
Grindr should implement a way that you can automatically reject people, and this sends an automated message to them. Perhaps it could be like a swiping UX like in Tinder or a thumbs down or something. Maybe deleting an unopened message could prompt the message. Just make it so that people like me don't get **** from the one place where we thought we would be embraced. In my country, we don't have gay bars or parties. Only a few cities hold pride parades. For most of us, Grindr is the "gay" life. It's more than a dating app; it's a place where we can be ourselves. And to come online and face this kind of demeaning, condescending treatment is worse than any homophobia I've faced. Straight people don't do this to each other. ****, most educated, open-minded straight people But a few physically endowed men in the gay community feel entitled to do this. Grindr has the social responsibility to make sure all its users feel at ease, and emotionally protected. Because we have a lot of other people willing to ruin our lives without us doing it ourselves.