Filter by sex & gender identity.
I often find myself having a hard time filtering through profiles that are by not only men with feminine gender expressions, which I have no issue with, but actual cis gendered women. I support the use of Grindr by anyone who is looking for whatever reason.
But we want what we want. For those looking for a good match it would be best to include all possible identity factors, assuming those are legitimate deal breakers that have no malice intended for the person not selected.
I’m not a misogynist for not being attracted to women anymore than I’m transphobic for not having a sexual attraction in that direction. Likewise I’m not dissing or hating more feminine gender expressing men by not feeling a strong sexual attraction to them.
The filters for gender identity & sex would allow for a much more specific approach that would much more easily pair likeminded people without the need for “masc only” profiles or otherwise “looking for ____”. A selection in the profile that allows others to search or not search for themselves using that criteria would also allow for options when one would prefer to not self apply labels but allow for an open inclusive search where they would appear when those filters are selected.
By reciprocation though it would be equally fair to allow for a feature allowing an omission of those profiles during a search. I don’t believe these are narrow minded or old fashioned needs or ideas. There is a wide variance of expression within the gay community. However sex is as personal as voting & we all have a right to choose our ideal mate without input from others whether it be a Christian family values advocate or your own friends.
Our sexuality is unique & that does mean at times exclusivity. Sexual freedom is as much about being allowed to say no as having the freedom to say yes. Our sexuality as men is typically fairly hardwired. It isn’t a moral issue, a kindness issue or a tolerance issue. We should help honor each other’s types, fetishes, kinks, and orientation. I’m a gay man. I’m not bi or attracted to feminine behaviors or appearance.
I still support those members of the gay community that are more feminine. But I am & always will be attracted to masculinity. And had this not already been a somewhat difficult thing to address, in person, at the widest time, in the past, and knowing other guys who’ve had similar experiences, it seems those options are necessary to avoid time wasted & feelings unintentionally hurt.
Narrowing our search only helps everyone meet their ideal match & ensures everyone is only having a great time.
I realize there are a lot of passionate opinions on this issue from both sides. There are great debates that could be had on the subject of masculinity & being a gay man. Some have happened. But a lot of what could be said positively about masculinity is often silenced by those assuming advocating for that in any way or for features on Grindr that would help allow for a search of only masculine gender expression is a threat, a dismissal, or discrimination against others who don’t meet that criteria. This is as untrue as it is that we as gay men, discriminate against women by not feeling a strong attraction to them, reciprocating advances, or refusing to reframe or rethink that lack of attraction to allow them to be included in our dating options.
From someone’s who’s tried dating feminine men several times over the years, sincerely loving them & wanting it to work, I can say my wiring is what it is. And I do as much harm to them, however unintentionally, by trying to deny that as I do to myself. we all need to accept all of us as we are and that means accepting that none of us are for everyone. That not everyone is for everyone else. That our differences make us great & that will inevitably mean we feel differently, want differently, and since all of us are finitely what we are we will match with very specific kinds of people.
What I do by choosing the wrong guy for me is to deny him the chance to find the right guy for him.
Cody Lee commented
Hello this is to all genders an anyone else reading my post this Oct 28th 2021 I'm Cody CODYLEE in Panama City Florids mixed Dark tan complexion year around 6'-170 LBS I'm Cherokee Indian canuncreole black French an Italian very very sexual male can get up to 9 " on ""Vista party favors in cockpump an if your a awesome cock plessure you should have a y problem feeling an ex I eriancei f all 9 +".I'm searching for anyone wa to g most all servi es to sugar daddies FWB widower handicped freaks with kinky fetuses an masters domain bdsm plessure an obeisance an any dyke domain that use pegging sissies daddies slots 8507393330 text or call anytime if you don't reach leave message text or your number an wat your looking for an how long hrs days weeks li e in become my owner ect,I'll return your message an talk an before hanging up I'll make you xum promise kissing mmkiss kiss , mmm lots if tongue I dark room no facial hair ,none I'm smooth ALovrrr except arm pits an on my TOP Head mmm lick my whole body.im always usually home in l ess I'm with 1 of yall taking new clients